Introducing Blackberry, self-named pseudonym for my eldest girl who is now 8 and a half. Other name suggestions from other members of the family were Firestarter, Pathblazer, Doughnut, those of you who know us will recognise all of these I'm sure!
And so Blackberry indeed takes us along our parenting journey boldly, eyes wide open. She confidently announced to a neighbour 'I'm Never Going Back to School!' this morning (she speaks her heart in the moment without cause for thought). And indeed in the whole year we've been doing this, even in the hardest moments she's never looked back to formal education.
And yet she has been the bane of our life at times as we pull our hair out (both trained teachers!) in bewilderment of well what Do you want to learn then?
Her gift to us all has been the realisation that we need not 'Teach' her anything. She is an intrepid explorer, experimenter, researcher. The teaching goes both ways, the learning is universal. Whilst we navigate the path towards respectful communication and ways to make sure all our needs are met within our family unit, we uncover basic skills for life and development.
This evening she watched a documentary with her Dad. She soaked up information about elements and stars with such joy that we will doubtless be talking about this together for days. As she settled down to sleep it was with the security and trust of someone who is being given the space and responsibility to seek out her own map of the world, manual for life.
I find myself daily finding a deeper trust that children learn the skills and information needed for their growth into adulthood wholly when they are ready. Each stage presents itself symbiotically, we need not fret about whether they will know all they need to know (though of course as responsible and loving parents we do fret and check ourselves regularly!)
When the need (to know something) arises, so too does the desire and thirst to find out. Blackberry reaches out and gets what she needs, it is her nature.
When I recently asked Cupcake if she wanted to go to school she said, "Well I couldn't, could I mommy? Not with my being so creative and active!" She would get along with Blackberry, I'm sure!
ReplyDeleteThey sure know what they want :) !!!!!
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