I don't wish to be boring, but it really grows on me this lifestyle. I was reflecting the other day about relationships with siblings and how the school style of splitting off the age groups immediately starts us off not really knowing our family. By the time I was born, both my brother and sister were in school and my sister and I were never in the same building even my whole schooling career. My brother, with such vast differences in the peer influences four years apart were not seen to converse at school or in front of friends.
This is just one of the reasons why for me the education system is not acceptable anymore. If it gets in the way of natural growth and alliances, then no thank you. We've been trying the same way as a culture for soooo long. And it falls way short of the mark of preparing children for life. I don't mean to exclude or offend, I am calling from my corner of experience about what works for us.
And three children in a bedroom works for us. Low TV input works for us.
Talking through relationship issues, home difficulties works too.
Cooking, being involved in the running of the house makes sense.
Looking out for their individual jewels and polishing them feels wholesome.
Being with them as they grow is reassuring for us all.
Being the ones who are here to experience the breakthroughs, the magical moments as we learn about our world is life-affirming.
Heavens I'm going through a bit of a reflective one at the moment aren't I!
Me in relation to what has been the 'norm' perhaps, acceptance and forgiveness for the things I might like to have done differently myself at various points in my life.
I don't like being an outsider, still. But I don't like it enough to go back to school thats for sure. What we have feels rich, wholesome and quite simply do-able! Which for parenting is sometimes what it boils down to isn't it! I'd love to communicate that feeling of deep peace that what we are doing is just right for us all.
Monday 30 July 2012
Thursday 26 July 2012
Gracefully Skint, Staying Confident
I can get all in a twiddle thinking which blog is which - is this just for home school stuff - do I need to be really clear about what I put on here?
And then I think of other Very Good blogs that I follow and think No! This is a blog about day-to-day life and reflections. Another place I write is Conjuring Lyrical and the distinction (kind of) is that I let myself loosen into creative flow more there, its less clear what I'm writing about.
So here, day to day, we are, financially speaking, on the ground. Floored, scraping the barrel, scratching around.
And yet, whilst that feels true some of the time, I also feel part of an abundant universe where I am very blessed. So I do get perspective on it when I can. I don't whine all the time!
Now I'm sure this is not down to home educating, though choosing to make the transition has been a full time job for both adults maintaining courage whilst buffeting each storm as we deschool. This wouldn't necessarily be the same for every family but it was for us. The transformations our lives have been through this last year have heartened and carried us a long way beyond the familiar frustrations of low-income life. Frugal Living and Voluntary Simplicity are two phrases I have learned describing ways that many people embrace this choice.
Maybe the painful moments are when I feel I'm not exercising a choice to be here, its all very well making the best of a situation and enjoying the benefits of both adults being largely at home but that can wear thin when its a struggle to buy the food for the week, petrol for the car etc. Always watching the figures, cancelling plans as the petrol prices continue to rise, imagining ways that I might ask for some help from relatives etc. All a bit dull!
My belief is that all is perfect: we draw to ourselves the situations and events that most help us evolve and grow towards the sun. Lots of learning, lots of growing. On the proactive, creative side, lets draw some strength from the anger and frustration when I feel I'm at the mercy of events or someone else's karma (is that even possible?!) - Own the Truth that we are here all together for whatever we need to learn and work through. Own the Reality that we have the money for what we truly want, its so easy to hide behind a 'we can't afford it' line, when really if we wanted it enough we'd make it happen.
I love being more home based. Its scary sometimes but it feels right. There is so much to do, feel and explore in the bosom of our hobbit hole. We don't have expensive tastes anymore which will no doubt be great when the money starts to flow a little more kindly, I grasp the value of items and services fairly acutely (please say I've learned that one now!) Our greatest expenditure bar the obvious is the decentest food we can find, local, organic, cooking from scratch, embracing our health as much as possible.
So I welcome this moment (have you noticed I write in affirmations when actually I want to grumble and whine? The next post might be the bitter twisted words that are getting pushed to the side now! or I'll save them for the sister site!) I welcome this very visceral experience of what Money has come to be, what we've made it as a global race. I trust that all is well and that we have everything we need.
How is this 'recession' or whatever we choose to call it affecting you and your family? What positive spins do you take on it when you can?
Love from Weststar, Gracefully skint, staying confident :)
And then I think of other Very Good blogs that I follow and think No! This is a blog about day-to-day life and reflections. Another place I write is Conjuring Lyrical and the distinction (kind of) is that I let myself loosen into creative flow more there, its less clear what I'm writing about.
So here, day to day, we are, financially speaking, on the ground. Floored, scraping the barrel, scratching around.
And yet, whilst that feels true some of the time, I also feel part of an abundant universe where I am very blessed. So I do get perspective on it when I can. I don't whine all the time!
Now I'm sure this is not down to home educating, though choosing to make the transition has been a full time job for both adults maintaining courage whilst buffeting each storm as we deschool. This wouldn't necessarily be the same for every family but it was for us. The transformations our lives have been through this last year have heartened and carried us a long way beyond the familiar frustrations of low-income life. Frugal Living and Voluntary Simplicity are two phrases I have learned describing ways that many people embrace this choice.
Maybe the painful moments are when I feel I'm not exercising a choice to be here, its all very well making the best of a situation and enjoying the benefits of both adults being largely at home but that can wear thin when its a struggle to buy the food for the week, petrol for the car etc. Always watching the figures, cancelling plans as the petrol prices continue to rise, imagining ways that I might ask for some help from relatives etc. All a bit dull!
My belief is that all is perfect: we draw to ourselves the situations and events that most help us evolve and grow towards the sun. Lots of learning, lots of growing. On the proactive, creative side, lets draw some strength from the anger and frustration when I feel I'm at the mercy of events or someone else's karma (is that even possible?!) - Own the Truth that we are here all together for whatever we need to learn and work through. Own the Reality that we have the money for what we truly want, its so easy to hide behind a 'we can't afford it' line, when really if we wanted it enough we'd make it happen.
I love being more home based. Its scary sometimes but it feels right. There is so much to do, feel and explore in the bosom of our hobbit hole. We don't have expensive tastes anymore which will no doubt be great when the money starts to flow a little more kindly, I grasp the value of items and services fairly acutely (please say I've learned that one now!) Our greatest expenditure bar the obvious is the decentest food we can find, local, organic, cooking from scratch, embracing our health as much as possible.
So I welcome this moment (have you noticed I write in affirmations when actually I want to grumble and whine? The next post might be the bitter twisted words that are getting pushed to the side now! or I'll save them for the sister site!) I welcome this very visceral experience of what Money has come to be, what we've made it as a global race. I trust that all is well and that we have everything we need.
How is this 'recession' or whatever we choose to call it affecting you and your family? What positive spins do you take on it when you can?
Love from Weststar, Gracefully skint, staying confident :)
Sunday 22 July 2012
The Girl Who Didn't Want to be Taught!
Introducing Blackberry, self-named pseudonym for my eldest girl who is now 8 and a half. Other name suggestions from other members of the family were Firestarter, Pathblazer, Doughnut, those of you who know us will recognise all of these I'm sure!
And so Blackberry indeed takes us along our parenting journey boldly, eyes wide open. She confidently announced to a neighbour 'I'm Never Going Back to School!' this morning (she speaks her heart in the moment without cause for thought). And indeed in the whole year we've been doing this, even in the hardest moments she's never looked back to formal education.
And yet she has been the bane of our life at times as we pull our hair out (both trained teachers!) in bewilderment of well what Do you want to learn then?
Her gift to us all has been the realisation that we need not 'Teach' her anything. She is an intrepid explorer, experimenter, researcher. The teaching goes both ways, the learning is universal. Whilst we navigate the path towards respectful communication and ways to make sure all our needs are met within our family unit, we uncover basic skills for life and development.
This evening she watched a documentary with her Dad. She soaked up information about elements and stars with such joy that we will doubtless be talking about this together for days. As she settled down to sleep it was with the security and trust of someone who is being given the space and responsibility to seek out her own map of the world, manual for life.
I find myself daily finding a deeper trust that children learn the skills and information needed for their growth into adulthood wholly when they are ready. Each stage presents itself symbiotically, we need not fret about whether they will know all they need to know (though of course as responsible and loving parents we do fret and check ourselves regularly!)
When the need (to know something) arises, so too does the desire and thirst to find out. Blackberry reaches out and gets what she needs, it is her nature.
And so Blackberry indeed takes us along our parenting journey boldly, eyes wide open. She confidently announced to a neighbour 'I'm Never Going Back to School!' this morning (she speaks her heart in the moment without cause for thought). And indeed in the whole year we've been doing this, even in the hardest moments she's never looked back to formal education.
And yet she has been the bane of our life at times as we pull our hair out (both trained teachers!) in bewilderment of well what Do you want to learn then?
Her gift to us all has been the realisation that we need not 'Teach' her anything. She is an intrepid explorer, experimenter, researcher. The teaching goes both ways, the learning is universal. Whilst we navigate the path towards respectful communication and ways to make sure all our needs are met within our family unit, we uncover basic skills for life and development.
This evening she watched a documentary with her Dad. She soaked up information about elements and stars with such joy that we will doubtless be talking about this together for days. As she settled down to sleep it was with the security and trust of someone who is being given the space and responsibility to seek out her own map of the world, manual for life.
I find myself daily finding a deeper trust that children learn the skills and information needed for their growth into adulthood wholly when they are ready. Each stage presents itself symbiotically, we need not fret about whether they will know all they need to know (though of course as responsible and loving parents we do fret and check ourselves regularly!)
When the need (to know something) arises, so too does the desire and thirst to find out. Blackberry reaches out and gets what she needs, it is her nature.
Thursday 19 July 2012
Cool jumping videos :)
Some videos of people doing wow things.
(this is beautifully shot and really fun to watch :) it has the word sh** in the first minute or so if you want to miss that x)
S l o w down!
It is nearly a year since we were last in school!
And things have settled, we have all agreed to carry on for another year which feels great. I feel the first full breaths of really accepting home ed as part of our lifestyle.
Thoughts from this week are about there being No Rush.
And, not unsurprisingly it links to a lot I have to say about safe birthing (here's where to find my breechbaby blog). Our lives unfold, our children grow and learn, opportunities come and go, anxiety can come and go too. If we push, we don't go any faster. What's that phrase: Less Haste More Speed...
Nothing needs to be decided in a hurry. Everything has its moment. The world may like us to think that every second is a crucial pivotal moment. Whenever I fall into that trap, I find panic! I prefer the heartfelt truth that there is always time to breathe, to come back to base and to listen to whats next.
And things have settled, we have all agreed to carry on for another year which feels great. I feel the first full breaths of really accepting home ed as part of our lifestyle.
Thoughts from this week are about there being No Rush.
And, not unsurprisingly it links to a lot I have to say about safe birthing (here's where to find my breechbaby blog). Our lives unfold, our children grow and learn, opportunities come and go, anxiety can come and go too. If we push, we don't go any faster. What's that phrase: Less Haste More Speed...
Nothing needs to be decided in a hurry. Everything has its moment. The world may like us to think that every second is a crucial pivotal moment. Whenever I fall into that trap, I find panic! I prefer the heartfelt truth that there is always time to breathe, to come back to base and to listen to whats next.
Wednesday 11 July 2012
No room for school!
I want more photos on this blog! I guess thats up to me isn't it! Still only just managing to weave the writing on the blog let alone make it as attractive and colourful as some of my blog sister sites (I have totally made this phrase up but it is how I have come to find this late night blog surfing)
Today I got a job! 21 hours variable shift work, fairly low paid but something I wanted ~ with elderly folk ~ new skills and new beginnings all round. We will be threading it into our home ed lifestyle and I have every trust that it will fit in well, shifting us towards supporting ourselves financially. We are only now learning to earn our bread after a combined formal education of forty years, I trust our journey will put us in good stead to model this essential skill for our kids.
We recently stayed with good friends where I had a trial run at home educating whilst doing school runs for my niece. It was too much for me! Sure, one or the other, but both was too much. One of the beauties and central bonuses of the home ed lifestyle for me, is the honouring of natural cycles. Of letting the day unfold, play its course and then curl up to bed.
I have never been a great fan of the clock, and then when adding children to the mix it surely went out the window. Try explaining to a 2 year old that the clocks have gone back and bedtime is at a different time today it just never washed with me. Biorhythms, dips and rises in the humidity, heat, moon phases, these are the nuances to our days. Our routine is structurally sound but moves as a fractal not a machine.
I know this will not wash with my new employer! And clocks are great for meeting up with others, not to mention their clever mechanics and maths opportunities! Maybe its just 9 and 3 I struggle with! Perhaps 7.30 and 12.30 would suit me better, where have our individual choices gone?!
I think that for Elderflower it is one more year all together with no flexischooling; we will of course check this through with her, but we've already giggled together that with our current timetable there is no room for school! I know myself well enough to know that it is better to do one thing well than to try to do many things half-cocked. One home ed group in particular is flourishing, building these relationships is where I am at.
I commit myself to more natural unfoldings, to including our children in their own growth and development, to listening to their needs and the advice and inspiration of other families, to trusting myself as my child's guardian and nurturer.
Bring it on! Next year's gonna be great!!!
Today I got a job! 21 hours variable shift work, fairly low paid but something I wanted ~ with elderly folk ~ new skills and new beginnings all round. We will be threading it into our home ed lifestyle and I have every trust that it will fit in well, shifting us towards supporting ourselves financially. We are only now learning to earn our bread after a combined formal education of forty years, I trust our journey will put us in good stead to model this essential skill for our kids.
We recently stayed with good friends where I had a trial run at home educating whilst doing school runs for my niece. It was too much for me! Sure, one or the other, but both was too much. One of the beauties and central bonuses of the home ed lifestyle for me, is the honouring of natural cycles. Of letting the day unfold, play its course and then curl up to bed.
I have never been a great fan of the clock, and then when adding children to the mix it surely went out the window. Try explaining to a 2 year old that the clocks have gone back and bedtime is at a different time today it just never washed with me. Biorhythms, dips and rises in the humidity, heat, moon phases, these are the nuances to our days. Our routine is structurally sound but moves as a fractal not a machine.
I know this will not wash with my new employer! And clocks are great for meeting up with others, not to mention their clever mechanics and maths opportunities! Maybe its just 9 and 3 I struggle with! Perhaps 7.30 and 12.30 would suit me better, where have our individual choices gone?!
I think that for Elderflower it is one more year all together with no flexischooling; we will of course check this through with her, but we've already giggled together that with our current timetable there is no room for school! I know myself well enough to know that it is better to do one thing well than to try to do many things half-cocked. One home ed group in particular is flourishing, building these relationships is where I am at.
I commit myself to more natural unfoldings, to including our children in their own growth and development, to listening to their needs and the advice and inspiration of other families, to trusting myself as my child's guardian and nurturer.
Bring it on! Next year's gonna be great!!!
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